dreams to dreams...

unlike my boyfriend, i am not gay. i love gay men! there is so much to look forward to in my life. i have to battle the evil in my home all the time?! it's not easy girls! i recently did a vlog called false people, which can be found in my youtube channel:

http://www.youtube.com/user/Gray99

i am now blonde and happy. i love bora bora, the perfume! i want this scent next?! today i just feel better. it's like my Mother has alerted all of the Angels, to protect me from evil. my mom broke our toilet. i can't wait until she leaves this planet?! i even prayed that she would die soon..?

talk to moi!

well i bought a film called, men in uniform. i have watched 6 sex scenes, and idk what to think about it. the majority of the boys are strippers/escorts??? the 6th scene featured a younger couple, who had wonderful assests! tastey rears and gears! i have bought many compilations in the past, and here they are in order of which i bought first (i forgot some of the names, so i made them up):

hottie
flame 2
all black
pearl room

flame and pearl, where great. the boys got down good! the rest, not so hot. bland, and boring. hottie had most of it's hottest scenes cut out? the once older man, topped the living hell out of this sexy younger white/native american man. the dick scenes where cut out! it was such a shame, cause it was a doggie style scene! frown! i have bought many glossy porn vids as well!

creamy biege!

i am going blonde in a few months. i am so excited! i have new products to buy. i decided to go blonde since it's cheaper for moi! a couple of my gay friends tell me, that when a gay guy falls for a straight male, that they can only admire them. i like that! this one boy saw me as str8 and he prayed that i would turn gay, to give him a chance?!

i like him, even though he is a simp! i want to suckle his soft toes... anyway! i had an encounter with this one boy, who wanted me for the longest time?! for a whole college semester he lusted, and i never even knew. i saw him as cute! i loved how he lined his eyes with charcoal!


well 3 months later, i saw him with the dick hungry look on his face! he looked so pretty! one day he was bent over, and i saw his round plump rear end. it was like two grapes glued next to each other... i had him, and he had a strong secretion, which turned me on. it was musty and sweaty! but i craved it!

when it was done, we both moved on with our lives. i am so glad that he gave me him. it taught me that, if i want something, then i will get it! he has pretty white beige skin!

every man's fantasy!

I've had a map laid out from the day I was born
But the roads are blocked, and the paper is worn
And all the books I've read, and the things I know
Never taught me to laugh, never taught to let go

i had a german friend tell me something, which left me mad. he said that even though i claim that i'm gay, i'm really str8?! all str8 men loved girl-girl action. i understand his words, and i'm fine with it. who care right?! most of my past lovers -like 4- claim that i love lebiansism. i don't, but i've watched it on cable tv?

hbo, showtime, and skinemax all have adult shows/films, which feature lesbians. I still remember watching a film called the sex spa! i love it, since Dale DaBone is such a hotty!

he has a hott as fuck body, and smooth curves. there is one lesbo scene between Monique Alexandere and Dru Berrymore. mon gives dru a message in a room. then she begins to go down on her. after a little foreplay, both ladies get naked and do the lezie pretzel! they both hump each other for deal life, until they collapse into each other's arms. kissing follows. all the moaning, is a little sick, but it's part of the scene.

it did strike a cord with me??? i've never scene girls make love in that sort of postion???? there was such abondon, and lust, that i was shocked! i don't believe that girl-girl is every man's fantasy, nonetheless. but this scene told me one thing, that a female can please another, in a sexual way.

to each their own, but i prefer gay porn!!!

Red

i've been through a lot of curbs in the vast 5 years. but thing, that i realized just now, is this? i haven't beeb a professional red in a long time?! i haven't done this kind of red since november 2007?! since then it had been revlon colorsilk reds!

this sunday, i will once again use pro-redde! the last salon red, which i used was, Excellence HiColor "Sizzling Copper"!



But I'm going right back to Miss Clairol, where it all started?! I am mixing up shades, and coming up with Dazzling Medium Plum Redde!

Topics coming up

Well I have some good stuff to share with the world. My vlogs will be hott! I don't get a lot of views, which tells me that some people live in denial, and are online, just to terrorize people! I'm coming after them!

Topics coming up:

Just say no...to online predators/haterz

UFO connections-

PLEIADEANS
ANTARCTICAN

Dakota Rivva's!!!

Dakota Rivers does not disappoint. He solo scene on Randy Blue is hott. I love his hair, since it's toned with honey, and a little ash! He is so pretty! Delicate, and his cock is huge! I wonder how many buttholes, has it humped in?! God Dakota's dick is going to break, if he doesn't give it a rest! HAHA! JK of course. I am so proud of him!

Please watch Cross Country 2!

sticky sweet!

no i won't have a new perfume to buy. it costs too much. but i love esacada and britney spears.

so here is the down low!

escada:
Pacific Paradise by Escada

Ocean Lounge

Sexy Graffiti


Midnight Fantasy


i want all of these!

Beast vs. Man!

boy do i got a story for ya'll. i got a south east asian friend who is fine as hell! got a smooth light brown beige body. got a nice tight ass, which shows through his jeans. he wears no underwear, which is smokin! he has blue eyes and black hair, which is colored that tone- via loreal paris usa.

he has 5 boyfriends. 2 of them are his supervisors! he is now gay, but once bi. he told me that he wants to go beastial with a black male horse. he found an organization which supports bestiality. they can set up a date for him. he wants to fuck a horse in the forest.

basically he wants a fun fucking tastic hump day with a male horse. he wants to loose all inhibitions, and hump that animals pussy, like there is no tomorrow!! that is hott! i'm not a beastial, but he did offer me a paid opportunity?! i declined, he and giggled! a know another guy who loves that shit.

he was watching a stable for a family. this blonde horse submissively gave itself to him. he said that the fucking so warm and butter hot, that he collapsed on the male horses ass afterwards. he went buckwild in that horse pussy, until his dick fell. they had 3 more encounters, and now he fucks horses like I drink water!

Jell!

i am so desparate to get laid, that i signed up for adultfriendfinder.com. so i decided to be honest, with my person page?! all i want is fucking, and being a bottom is not problamo! the only thing is, i will have to meet that person, at their own place or motel!

i am completely trusting! condoms always! i decided to seek whores, who are over 50! i will have to change that?!

Time to dance!!!

there are some sweltering boyz in the porn biz! i luv them!

one day, i will get back into watching gay porn. i plan to watch it with my husband?! who knows, what his reaction will be?!

Paradise Found
Cross Country: Part 1
Black Balled 5: Star Fucker

wanna watch these!

i like chris!

my desert life is over with, and i keep evolving. i decided that i must move on, beyond the hate and evil which engulfs me. it's only for the moment! it has been a long time, since i have enjoyed the company of a male! the last time, i've been with a guy, was in 2007! i sucked his dick, and his jizz was like coconut!

he was no more than 6", and it was soft and supple! it tasted good, and he just came in me! since then, i've had no luck! i haven't watched gay porn either! it was become so bleek to me, since it no longer impresses me! i luv amateur porn better!

btw, chris crocker is my fave right now! so here are my fave clips from him:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rp198k984Yw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wm1tHF5oneU

Get a life, and stop hating on white people!

I've been really down lately. I realized that hate is not the answer! The holidays bring about the hatred and truth of normal people! They live a fib, and the holidays expose them! I am currently residing in a conservative town, and I can sense the dread of prejudice of post-Thanksgiving!

A white man's holiday, is the only way they choose to see it as! The college feast was gross! I got sick off the food, and it wasn't even traditional! It was revamped crap, that was catered towards minorities- in live in Hawaii! The stuffing was just croutons in oil, and the gravy was lard!

I got the runs from it! My hair right now it dark ashe brown! I am currently on Dessert Life burnout! Too much karma, and it hurts! A man wants me to fuck him, and he is positive! I will only have sex with him, if I get to wear a condom?!

Lube it inside and out and ram it into that pussy!

Yummy fruit!

Monday night
Tuesday night
Friday night
Every night
Why?
Cause I can

New York and Japan
With the stop up in Milan
After all
I'm a man

I'll get to know your family
Get your friends to fall in love with me
Just happens all so easily
Easily

I'll have you thinking I'm the one
You play your part I play along
We can have a lot of fun
Until I'm done

Weeelll I am not done with college life. It has gotten easier since I have put God first, which is something I NEVER did!
It was always moi!

Now it’s Him and moi! Well I am currently using Cherry Lipsmacker at my home! I’ve always used Chapstick, but I switched! Why? Because petroleum tastes gross…unless it’s used in other ways???? But that fantasy will come true later on!
Here is a list of all the Smacker’s I’ve used:

Dr. Pepper
Cherry 7 up
Root Beer
Berry Peach
Bubble Gum
Cookie Dough
Cotton Candy
Strawberry
Watermelon
Aztec Punch
Strawberry Banana
Mango Melon
Royal Berry Punch
Watermelon Cherry
Slammin' Strawberry Kiwi
Strawberry
Banana Berry
Strawberry Watermelon
Mango Peach
Cherry

It's no sweat
Get the check
Show respect
Don't forget you'll pay me later
That's the plan

Why?

My best friend told me that my hair color should reflect my soul. When I have pale blonde hair, I have fuller hair! My hair is dark blonde, and it's real flat! It's not healthy! It's damaged and the color is real rusty!

I might as well go for burgundy?! White males are hated by minorities for being beautiful! I experience this at my college in Hawaii. I can't be too blonde or radiant with my hair color! It's discrimination.

I hate myself, since my image is failing! I look like hell!

The darker side of CNN

I can't sleep without expressing this! This evening I was watching CNN and I nearly died inside watching that Jim Jones story! In South America he opened his business, and there was nothing but black people in the congregation!!! DAMN LMAO! Nothing but black people on that plane from the U.S. to South America!

I was so embarrassed and enraged at CNN for making fools out of minorities once AGAIN! Always trying to cover the real story! And no I don't buy that black lady's story of being a victim at that Church!

DAMN I can't stop laughing out of embarrassment!

Too much kiddo!

I was unhappy with the midterm grade I got from my Finance class. I was devastated and literally in tears, within my head. I hated it! I felt like, I was in a nightmare! I felt like I was never going to graduate, and become a loser of society with no prospects. I was ready to study my ass off triple time!

But NOW… I realize, that the threat of failure was actually a Gift… The Universe was telling me to, calm down and claim what is mine..? This whole semester, all I could think about was being a star and kicking ass, my own way!!! However…that wasn’t the Lord’s way..!

He wanted me to be happy, and realize that I am human, and the he controls everything! I can only pray for a miracle, that I will pass this class and move on. I got to remember, that politics play a lot into, what is used to create exams. My teacher didn’t write the exam, so why should I be mad at him???

He said that regardless of my exam grades, that I’m dong TERRIFIC! I hope so! I believe him! Oh well..! I will try again, and do my best. All I need is a passing grade. I shall pray for a miracle..?

Update!

Hi everyone, I'll update my blog very soon...

Never Go Home Again

I'll never go home again
I'll never go home again
I'll never go home again

What is important for me to know about myself:

Dark blonde
American
Spiritual

Well I just woke up from a horrid sleep 4 hours ago. I feel good. God has been taking away a lot of my pain. My weight lost, is doing great. I’m nocturnal, which implies that I’m Post-Meridian.

My whole soul celebrates the night. I hope, that I can find a wonderful night job, after I have finished college?

I love life…it sucks at times, but my God is there to feed me. Most people wouldn’t survive at night, but I will. I want to live in night switch.

Sleep in the day, live by the night...

Believe in yourself people. I know it’s hard, when guilt and power gets you down. But you’ll make it. I know I will…

There's a home for you here

Where love is unconditional

Go to the light, never say never

Pop

I never realized how much Mommie Dearest, has influenced popular cinema? I am watching it now, and it kills me just how, this film is copied into so many dramas- in order to give it camp appeal!

I think it’s odd, that people take this movie so seriously! It’s funny! BTW: What is normal. Functionalist's base their studies on an idealist culture...which BTW doesn’t exist. The whole world is based on ideals, which BTW are made up. What is a boy, girl, man, woman? What is normal? Be genuine people. Labels are labels.

Scott Douglas -in the movie, Our Mother's Murder- is totally based upon Joan's persona from Mommie Dearest. This is just one example, of how this film has helped in the camp of many films...

I think that the real Joan lived a very victimized life. In the end, she is the hero of MD. She is medicated and possible a criminal on the run? Overall, I think she was a great actor.