When hell gets me down, I always forget just how much of a child I am to God. How important I am to Her, and just how much she blesses me! The hottest time had as a young adult-as well as the hardest- was the second semester of my junior year. Although it was hard and such a downer...I realized in my person time that, if I'm to be a boy in the adult world...!
I'm going to have to ALWAYS realize just how much God loves me! I lost that once I got a job after high school! I thought I could take over my life. I was in secret and somehow my life became a mirage for some reason!
Reacted to the fact on how you make me act
Shy but sexy at the same time
Always on my mind was a little bump and grind
Usually I don't play it that close, youz gots to kick it with me
Before I serve you up with an overdose, of the Silky, little mommy
Make you my man, ain't got no love for nobody else but you
That's my song of that year! I cry...my Dessert Life keeps getting more harsher! But I'm beginning to realize once again! Just how much my God truly knows me, blesses me and luvs me! That I never really knew until now!
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Waiting Forever!!!
Why..? I believe in love. It's very hard for queers to express themselves in my work. Did you know, that when you’re fed up with the twirls in your life, that you can ask God for a savings… Left he went. You can’t always trust the ones who love you. They may truly hate you.
I babble. Everyone has a way of coping with a Desert Life Trial! I love the great ways to express it! I’m almost done with mine, and I can understand when someone has just finished theirs! I understand that the air is clearer, and you just don’t care about things which used to get on your nerves, like before!
I'm waiting for that time to happen! God my trials are knocking off one bi one!!!!! In the meantime all I can do is cry...
I babble. Everyone has a way of coping with a Desert Life Trial! I love the great ways to express it! I’m almost done with mine, and I can understand when someone has just finished theirs! I understand that the air is clearer, and you just don’t care about things which used to get on your nerves, like before!
I'm waiting for that time to happen! God my trials are knocking off one bi one!!!!! In the meantime all I can do is cry...
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Hi girls,
Everybody is a star, you know who you are
This is your chance to shine
It's got to come from the heart, do it right from the start
And step into the light
Well I’m coping with my desert trial okay. I’m still going through the cranks of the roost of it, IE The Glamazon! It’s a very hard period for me, since I don’t know left from right most of the time! However, I know I will move with my life.
You really can’t be happy, until it’s all over! I read that some people really feel deep into a well of tears. Almost suicidal to get to the point! But once you overcome it, you feel so much joy and freedom!!! It’s meant to heal all wounds from all your past lives!!! I wish all people –who are going through this- luck!
Everybody is a star, you know who you are
This is your chance to shine
It's got to come from the heart, do it right from the start
And step into the light
Wednesday, October 15, 2008
Dreams...
who's that dying,
trying for a space in the cage you call your life
who's that crying
crying out just what it is you've thrown away
My friend Linda and I went to a party where there were tones of drugs going on. Everyone was doing pot, and I was given a white paper pipe. This guy kept refilling, but I couldn’t puff. I wasn’t into drugs. Linda –a lesbian- used to take drugs, but she quit. However I refilled some “vodka” and gave it to her!
Then we left…We arrived at a white hall and walked up the flight of stairs. There was a bathroom in front of us, and a boy version of Total was getting ready up there. They looked fine, with their clothes off! Muscley but soft. We joined the other groups down the hall to the left of the bathroom. There were about to perform, and they fired their manager on the spot!
Linda and I –after everyone left- walked up another flight of stairs –into the wall. We then ended on the 3rd floor, and entered a very white room, where an after concert partied attended. Everyone was in an orgy mess. The singers were all wearing white thick thongs, and their hard and soft bodies were unique. I was hard.
Then Linda went for a smoke with a girl at the party, on the roof! No they wasn’t fuckin’! However they were romantically linked. The party moved, and only me, Niles –the ex-manager- and some dark man in a black business suit, were left into the room. I felt a need to leave, and I fled from the glass –white framed- doors. Outside, I spotted two black men coming out of a Jacuzzi room naked with only jeans halfway on. They were slim and their asses were hard and fat- which I found hott!!!
Their fag hags came out as well. The men began to undress and they had on very sheear’thin white g-strings on! One had curly strawberry hair, and the other had a short black flat top! I passed them and ran up the stairs, which then lead to a stack of stairs, which went downward!
I ended up in front of the bathroom, and two men were on the stairs. I fled into the bathroom, and turned on the light. It wasn’t brite as before! It was dim! I was in that bathroom and I felt this scary psychic felling…like I was in danger from the outside world or inside realm of knowledge! A Seraphim flashed and I never saw it again…. Done!!
trying for a space in the cage you call your life
who's that crying
crying out just what it is you've thrown away
My friend Linda and I went to a party where there were tones of drugs going on. Everyone was doing pot, and I was given a white paper pipe. This guy kept refilling, but I couldn’t puff. I wasn’t into drugs. Linda –a lesbian- used to take drugs, but she quit. However I refilled some “vodka” and gave it to her!
Then we left…We arrived at a white hall and walked up the flight of stairs. There was a bathroom in front of us, and a boy version of Total was getting ready up there. They looked fine, with their clothes off! Muscley but soft. We joined the other groups down the hall to the left of the bathroom. There were about to perform, and they fired their manager on the spot!
Linda and I –after everyone left- walked up another flight of stairs –into the wall. We then ended on the 3rd floor, and entered a very white room, where an after concert partied attended. Everyone was in an orgy mess. The singers were all wearing white thick thongs, and their hard and soft bodies were unique. I was hard.
Then Linda went for a smoke with a girl at the party, on the roof! No they wasn’t fuckin’! However they were romantically linked. The party moved, and only me, Niles –the ex-manager- and some dark man in a black business suit, were left into the room. I felt a need to leave, and I fled from the glass –white framed- doors. Outside, I spotted two black men coming out of a Jacuzzi room naked with only jeans halfway on. They were slim and their asses were hard and fat- which I found hott!!!
Their fag hags came out as well. The men began to undress and they had on very sheear’thin white g-strings on! One had curly strawberry hair, and the other had a short black flat top! I passed them and ran up the stairs, which then lead to a stack of stairs, which went downward!
I ended up in front of the bathroom, and two men were on the stairs. I fled into the bathroom, and turned on the light. It wasn’t brite as before! It was dim! I was in that bathroom and I felt this scary psychic felling…like I was in danger from the outside world or inside realm of knowledge! A Seraphim flashed and I never saw it again…. Done!!
Monday, October 13, 2008
Just like HIM?!
My goal in life is to run to Disney World! Once my savings fund reaches $10,000! You know, I want it all when I go there! I want me and my boy to eat all the Disney food we can gorge! Not to mention –don’t worry Tink I'll be there soon- I’m going to stay for the Tinkerbelle Finale!
Two years ago, my family and I went –my shitty family- to Disneyland! Now I was going to go shopping and get my Princess Poster in pink, and enjoy Captain Eggo- or whatever the hells it's name is. I had my own itinerary! Those plans shot straight to hell real fast! I was stuck in Kiddie Town, which I was happy about! So cute were the houses, and that sexy tan man with leggs!!!!!
I starved all day, while some of my shitty relatives ate pasta at the café! I wanted my special Disney soda there, you know the ice cream float! I missed Space Mountain, because I got laid. But I saw Alice –that nasty ho who I love- walking around! She’s so curt and pretty! Aurora and her boytoy were WOW! He and I had a second of a stare with eachother!
Oh well, I forced myself onto that pink teacup, before it got robbed from a loser! I spun, and LOVED IT! Very fast and fun! I’m going to Disney World to ride the BIG KIDS RIDE! And eat them jumbo hamburgers, fries and Strawberry Milkshake! YUM!
Than I was forced to go hungry and thirsty until all day and night! Oh, the parade was all that! I loved Arial and he fins. Her float looked so REAL, and I loved my Ursula! I got a Princess Lollipop –yea from the vendor whore, so!- and some kid dropped broke it to shattered pieces! It was the rainbow ones, and not the creamy strawberry.
Finally I got a bottle of water at night before the Tinkerbelle Show –curtsey of a shitty relative- and I almost had to refill it at a sink! YUM! The Tinkerbelle Finale was hot! I LOVED IT, and the firecrackers were so wondrous against the horizon! She was pretty. But this Mexican man –mediocre sexy- kept brushing his let against mine, while glaring at me- Are you faggot?! Looks like I almost get sexed AGAIN that night! After that I was happy to leave after such a fancy Grande Finale! My day was made! NOT REALLY!
My shitty relatives had to ride Space Mountain, while I had to WAIT! However that day I loved the Prehistoric Roller Coaster! I LOVED IT! I truly do believe in Prehistoric Mammals underground- DEEP UNDERGROUND! However I had to WAIT and fuckin’ ride the Indiana Jones boat ride, which was fun- at fuckin’ 5pm! But I loved it- really I did! So homoerotic and sexy!
I'll be buying my *Tink* *Tink* film…
This is the only existing blog that I use now! I left my MySpace page! Don’t worry, you’ll find out who I am warm very soon… Also, one other thing, I still love my myspace...
Two years ago, my family and I went –my shitty family- to Disneyland! Now I was going to go shopping and get my Princess Poster in pink, and enjoy Captain Eggo- or whatever the hells it's name is. I had my own itinerary! Those plans shot straight to hell real fast! I was stuck in Kiddie Town, which I was happy about! So cute were the houses, and that sexy tan man with leggs!!!!!
I starved all day, while some of my shitty relatives ate pasta at the café! I wanted my special Disney soda there, you know the ice cream float! I missed Space Mountain, because I got laid. But I saw Alice –that nasty ho who I love- walking around! She’s so curt and pretty! Aurora and her boytoy were WOW! He and I had a second of a stare with eachother!
Oh well, I forced myself onto that pink teacup, before it got robbed from a loser! I spun, and LOVED IT! Very fast and fun! I’m going to Disney World to ride the BIG KIDS RIDE! And eat them jumbo hamburgers, fries and Strawberry Milkshake! YUM!
Than I was forced to go hungry and thirsty until all day and night! Oh, the parade was all that! I loved Arial and he fins. Her float looked so REAL, and I loved my Ursula! I got a Princess Lollipop –yea from the vendor whore, so!- and some kid dropped broke it to shattered pieces! It was the rainbow ones, and not the creamy strawberry.
Finally I got a bottle of water at night before the Tinkerbelle Show –curtsey of a shitty relative- and I almost had to refill it at a sink! YUM! The Tinkerbelle Finale was hot! I LOVED IT, and the firecrackers were so wondrous against the horizon! She was pretty. But this Mexican man –mediocre sexy- kept brushing his let against mine, while glaring at me- Are you faggot?! Looks like I almost get sexed AGAIN that night! After that I was happy to leave after such a fancy Grande Finale! My day was made! NOT REALLY!
My shitty relatives had to ride Space Mountain, while I had to WAIT! However that day I loved the Prehistoric Roller Coaster! I LOVED IT! I truly do believe in Prehistoric Mammals underground- DEEP UNDERGROUND! However I had to WAIT and fuckin’ ride the Indiana Jones boat ride, which was fun- at fuckin’ 5pm! But I loved it- really I did! So homoerotic and sexy!
I'll be buying my *Tink* *Tink* film…
This is the only existing blog that I use now! I left my MySpace page! Don’t worry, you’ll find out who I am warm very soon… Also, one other thing, I still love my myspace...
Friday, October 3, 2008
The Other Side...
Let me kiss it
I'll make it better
And then tonight
You will forget her
I'll make it better
And then tonight
You will forget her
Control your soul
Let me control it
Control your soul
Let me control it
My Desert Period is going far. I realize that I can’t grow, and evolve unless I solve the question which God has put in front of me! You have to answer the call or else, you will be stuck!
I’m using the Book of James for help.
http://www.biblestudyinfo.com/james/intro.shtml
This site helps me, because it lets me know that James is actually a Pagan Ritualist…
He taught a very important Gospels…Faith with confusion causes downwardness..!
“But let him ask in faith, without any doubting, for he who doubts is like a wave of the sea, driven by the wind and tossed. 1:7 For let that man not think that he will receive anything from the Lord. 1:8 He is a double-minded man, unstable in all his ways.”
Lately I haven’t’ bought any porn! I love porn, but my budge won’t allow it! Besides I have quite a needy collection already!I love online shopping! Umm…I carry lip gloss around with me! I’ll use lipstick soon after I suck a cock luv~! I love lip plumpers from the drugstore. Who gives a shit if it isn’t collagen! I’m like that! Can you understand me..?
Wednesday, October 1, 2008
I’m the luckiest by far…
Hello bitches,
My birthday was fun! All I did was read a book for gay people! My bus took eons to arrive at my town… First off my bus was 45 minutes late, that bitch!!!! Next, I had an awful dinner of meatless stew- I’m a college student!
These guys, who have a crush on me, hate me for having a new boyfriend- who really is a friend of mine! I’m an adult so I act like one. But many students at my school don’t grow up, and I feel sorry for them! There’s more to life than living by what other people think of you!
I’m going through what most people refer to as a Desert Life Period! I’m slowly learning that no matter who anyone says, you have to be who you are, no matter what individual had said! I hate that, but I’m passing my Desert Life very fast! Other than that, I’m very happy I got past a very event. THE BIRTHDAY! I feel empowered especially since I’m a Fall Creature!
Gambler, gambler
I'm a gambler, and I will take you by surprise
Gambler, I'll aim this straight between your eyes
Gambler, yeah I know all the words to say
'Cause I'm a gambler, I only play the game my way, yeah
Don't want to say this but I think that I should
I'm better off forgotten if you think that I'd be good
One day you see me the next day I'm gone
Don't fight me baby I don't want to hold on
I'm a gambler, a gambler
You're not happy with the way I act
You better turn around boy, don't look back
You're getting angry, you know I can see
You're just jealous 'cause you can't be me
You can't stop me now
'Cause I'm right and I'm making advances
Let me show you how
Tonight, I'll be taking my chances
On you, on you, on you, on you, that's right baby
I'm a gambler, gambler
You understand what I'm talking about?
I'm a gambler, a gambler
Gambler, 'cause I'm a gambler
You can't stop me now
I'm on the road baby I know how
You can't stop me now
Oh no
You can't stop me now (repeat 3 times)
'Cause I'm a gambler, yeah I'm a gambler
That's right baby
My birthday was fun! All I did was read a book for gay people! My bus took eons to arrive at my town… First off my bus was 45 minutes late, that bitch!!!! Next, I had an awful dinner of meatless stew- I’m a college student!
These guys, who have a crush on me, hate me for having a new boyfriend- who really is a friend of mine! I’m an adult so I act like one. But many students at my school don’t grow up, and I feel sorry for them! There’s more to life than living by what other people think of you!
I’m going through what most people refer to as a Desert Life Period! I’m slowly learning that no matter who anyone says, you have to be who you are, no matter what individual had said! I hate that, but I’m passing my Desert Life very fast! Other than that, I’m very happy I got past a very event. THE BIRTHDAY! I feel empowered especially since I’m a Fall Creature!
Gambler, gambler
I'm a gambler, and I will take you by surprise
Gambler, I'll aim this straight between your eyes
Gambler, yeah I know all the words to say
'Cause I'm a gambler, I only play the game my way, yeah
Don't want to say this but I think that I should
I'm better off forgotten if you think that I'd be good
One day you see me the next day I'm gone
Don't fight me baby I don't want to hold on
I'm a gambler, a gambler
You're not happy with the way I act
You better turn around boy, don't look back
You're getting angry, you know I can see
You're just jealous 'cause you can't be me
You can't stop me now
'Cause I'm right and I'm making advances
Let me show you how
Tonight, I'll be taking my chances
On you, on you, on you, on you, that's right baby
I'm a gambler, gambler
You understand what I'm talking about?
I'm a gambler, a gambler
Gambler, 'cause I'm a gambler
You can't stop me now
I'm on the road baby I know how
You can't stop me now
Oh no
You can't stop me now (repeat 3 times)
'Cause I'm a gambler, yeah I'm a gambler
That's right baby
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